I got my hair done that day too. Holla.
I spent what I thought was a decent amount of time marketing this design. In my mind I thought of it as a movement. It meant so much to me to have the two paired together. But I'm no marketing genius and I didn't take the right steps to get it out there. I sent a couple of shirts to friends and asked them to take some funny pics for me. And they did.
I posted these pics periodically and made mugs & tumblers with the saying on them back when I was doing vinyl work. But I was still missing the mark. How I felt about this movement wasn't being conveyed in my marketing or my social media posts. I'm big enough to admit I didn't do a good job. The design (not the words) itself wasn't very good either. I was excited and slapped it on a tshirt and called it a day. So I decided that I needed to change that. When I reached out to the artist I use for some of my designs I stopped posting about it all together. You can see on my social media where the whole thing kind of fell off.
I got the new and much improved design back and I was in love. I sent the new design to my printer for mugs. To my other printer for shirts. And I was ready to try again. I sent out more shirts for pictures. I posted them on my social media. I used them on my website. They were great pics as you can see.
Instagram was looking better. People were starting to take notice. But STILL I was missing the mark. And now I know why! I wasn't using this as a platform to open up a dialog. I wasn't asking women to tell me about times that they had felt shamed. Posting pretty pictures wasn't connecting ALL types of mothers all over the United States (hopefully the world) because I wasn't asking them to tell their story. And in typical Nicke fashion....I decided to change that too.
I posted in my VIP Facebook group asking moms to tell me about times that they have been shamed or felt like they should be ashamed about something. The answers I got back were a range of funny things like, " there's so much food under the seats of my minivans I could feed a small army", to something as heart wrenching as this...
If this doesn't make your blood boil I don't know what will...
These stories in my VIP group were sparking so much conversation. It was amazing seeing women who had never met each other in person support each other and lift each other up. I decided to turn their stories into graphics to use on my social media platforms to spark even more conversations and support amongst women. And I say women because there are women who aren't even mothers lifting these ladies up and joining in the converstations.
It finally felt like I was hitting the mark. This thing that was always a MOVEMENT in my mind, and not just a design, was finally starting to gain momentum. No Shame in my Mom Game hasn't been an overnight success. It is still a work in progress. But slowly but surely it is snowballing into exactly what I want it to be.
This isn't just a design. It isn't just slapped on a mug or shirt because it's trendy. There have been variations of the words No Shame in my Mom Game done on shirts and mugs since I have put my design out in 2015. And while there was some ick about that initially I know in my heart that this thing is bigger than a trend. It's not about stirring the pot. It's not about exploiting people. It's about connection. It's about stories. It's about women, mostly mamas, but even women who aren't yet mamas, having a safe place to land. It's about a mug or shirt that can do the talking for you when you don't have the words to speak for yourself.
I hope you will come join the movement on Instagram. You can find me here .
If you have a story you would like to share with me about a time you have felt shame, or been shamed by someone else as a mother, please email them to me at firstname.lastname@example.org (don't worry you can remain anonymous if I turn your story into a graphic if you want!)
We are how mom shaming ends. Don't ever let 'em shame you, mamas.