It feels a little vain to be using myself as the spotlight for my blog post. I went back and forth about this for awhile and ultimately decided I would be the first person on the blog for this new direction I'm taking, in order to set the tone for a safe space for the following blog posts.
If you have been following me for awhile you know that I'm pretty (and by pretty, I mean EXTREMELY) passionate about the #NoShameInMyMomGame movement that I have founded through my company, page261. If you are new around my blog or my brand I think you will catch on pretty quickly as to what I'm all about. :) I decided my blog needed to take a new, more focused direction and I'm super excited about it. I hope you will continue to read each week to meet new women, learn from them, be inspired by them, & most importantly connect with them. Let me preface....this is a safe place. I have no time, patience or tolerance for internet trolls or people who feel the need to judge or shame ANY person who chooses to share on my blog. Please be mindful of this if you choose to comment on any of my platforms. Ok, so now that that's out of the way...let's get on to the interview...with myself...which is weird but I think necessary. Hope you enjoy!
Let's break the ice with a silly question...What's one song you know all the words to that would surprise people?
How Do You Want It by Tupac....true story.
What's your life as a mom like? How many kids do you have? How old are they?
I have 3 kids....2 daughters and a son in that order. They are 9, 3, and 17 months. Life is pretty crazy most days. Teaching them life lessons while balancing all of their different personality types, with my own very type A personality, is a daily struggle.
What is your favorite thing about your kids?
When they sleep? Is that an appropriate answer? Ha!
I love different things about all of them individually but I think my favorite thing to see as a whole, as a mother of 3, is seeing how they love each other. My son loves my oldest daughter so much and he just lights up when she's around. My middle child is a difficult one but when she shows love to her sister it melts my heart. There's something about a sister/sister bond at that young age that is so special.
What drives you crazy about your kids?
A lot of things! My oldest is a hoarder and not neat at all. It drives me insane! My middle is so stubborn and so difficult about EVERYTHING. She hates clothes. She has to have things just so. My youngest, my son, is so BUSY. He's into everything. I can literally be standing right next to him and he will find a way to eat paint. It's nuts! They rarely listen the first time I say something and that REALLY makes me crazy. But if I can step out of mom mode for a few minutes I can also see that the things that drive me crazy about them are also the things that I love about them too in some ways.
What does a typical day look like for you as a mom?
Most days are fly by the seat of my pants! Mondays and Tuesdays I don't have my oldest daughter. I had her during my first marriage and I share custody with her dad 50/50. We work super hard, together, to make sure she has a great life and she is lucky to have a dad that is as involved as he is after a divorce. So anyway, I'm down one kid on those days but it still seems super crazy! Monday and Wednesdays I take my littles to a family member's house. While they are there I go to the gym and then come home and hammer out as much work as I can while they are gone! The rest of the week is spent with them and fitting work in while I can. I take my oldest to and from school. The littles and I go to music class one day a week and the rest of the week is spent feeding them and fighting about pants. :)
Oh hey son...sorry you have to use your sister's left over baby items!
Can you share with us a time you have been shamed as a mom?
Honestly, I haven't felt like I've been outright shamed much as a mom. I think I give off a pretty strong don't f*ck with me vibe about most things. For example, I chose to only bottle feed my kids from the beginning and I never felt shamed for it. I'm sure people had opinions or judged me about it but they never said anything to my face. It just wasn't something that I wanted to do and I made that clear from the beginning with all 3 of my kids. However, I have felt shamed about my choices about religion with my children in the past, but in a very passive aggressive way, which honestly pisses me off more. That's all been laid to rest now, thankfully, but it just inspires me more to empower moms of all types to stand up for what they think is right for their kids.
How did you handle that situation?
I probably handled it poorly to be honest. I let it build up for awhile, the religion thing, because the person who I felt was shaming me was someone close to me. I felt like I had to balance their feelings, my feelings, my husband's feelings. And then it imploded. It was definitely a lesson in how NOT to deal with mom shaming in the future.
What's one thing you would like to share with anyone who thinks they need to shame a mother for her choices?
Anything you've thought negatively about me, or any other mom, we've probably already thought about ourselves first. We are our own worst critics. So in the moment you want to shame us maybe you can just give us a little grace. Because Lord knows we don't give it to ourselves often enough.
What surprised you most about when you became a mother?
The first time I became a mother I was surprised how much you can love a human so much it makes your heart hurt. When I became a mother the second and third time I was surprised there was any more room in my heart to love at that capacity x3. But I do. It's crazy how you can love all of them the same and differently at such an intense level.
In case I forget to mention it...my husband is pretty kickass. I mean he drives me nuts but he's mostly great.
What's one thing you said you would NEVER do as a mother but ended up doing?
Um...I don't think I really ever had plans to be a stay at home mom! And I was probably one of those moms that judged other moms in the grocery store when their kids are acting like assholes. "I will never let my kid do that." Ha! If only I would have known to give that mom a hug or a bottle of wine.
Can you share with us a mom hack? Anything that helps you or gets you through the day.
So I say this as someone who is on their phone a lot because of business and sometimes selfishly....but I have found that disconnecting from that and really being present and focusing on my kids, in the times I'm supposed to be with them, truly helps with their behavior. And that in turn makes my life easier on a lot of fronts. I can focus on them. They are loved in the moments they need it most. My work is of better quality because I'm not distracted. I am still working on this by the way!! It's a seriously hard habit to break to not be focused on business all the time.
Who's your "mom crush"?
Is it ok to say myself? I think I'm a pretty kickass mom & person...ha! But if it's not me then I would say that I do love some Chrissy Teigen tweets!
Finish this sentence..."There's No Shame in my Mom Game but I'm also kick ass at".....
Finishing a bottle of wine in one sitting. And lifting heavy weights.
Currently binge watching on Netflix?
I think it's actually on Amazon but Sneaky Pete.
Favorite way to get alone time?
Going to the gym.
Drink of choice?
Coffee. Water. Wine. In that order... most days.
Tell us something else you love about yourself.
I love that I am at a point in my life that I feel 100% comfortable in my own skin and on a personal level am not seeking validation in unhealthy places.
Tell us your "no shame in my mom game" mantra.
My kid's teacher said this the other day and it resonated with me so much so currently my mantra is "Do my best and forget the rest".
If you could give one piece of loving advice to yourself, and all the other women out there, what would it be?
Teach your kids love by loving yourself, and your spouse, first. Show them in your actions and your words to yourself and each other. And if you don't have kids or a spouse then teach the world about love by loving yourself first. You deserve it. :)
I hope you all enjoyed me interviewing myself to set the tone for this new direction. If you wanna hang out with me on social media you can find me on Instagram at @page261 or on Facebook at @pagetwosixtyone . Sign up for my email list here to stay up to date about new #noshameinmymomgame spotlights, new shop updates, lots of other goodness, and info on how to be featured on the blog!